Healing, Life

Taking time to Reflect & Heal

How often do you give yourself the permission to reflect on your life? How does this time for reflection effect your well-being?

These last couple weeks I’ve been needing some time to just sit back and be a part of life, rather than trying to push life in the direction I want it to go in. Allowing myself to be fully present in my life (accepting life as it is in a moment rather than trying to change people, things etc.) has been very healing. So often we hear how important it is to be proactive about our lives,to take action, to be intentional about the change we want to see in our lives. So I decided to be intentional about bring present in my life. I have been able to reflect, pray, and be fully present in the moments of my life instead of being distracted. As a result I’m appreciating more deeply the blessings I have in my life like my health, my son, my husband, my friends and family, and my spiritual life. This deeper and more intentional presence in my life is allowing me to feel happier, to not be as frustrated, and to be appreciative of my life.

This has been a much needed break for me. I often get angry and frustrated when life seems to be pushing or pulling me in directions I don’t want to go in. And feeling angry takes away from my happiness and diminishes my relationships. Therefore by shifting my focus and by being reflective and calm I have been able to reconnect to my feelings of happiness, and a sense of goodness in my life again.

I am also reading daily spiritual writings that invite me to intentionally reflect, and thus keep my focus on the positive instead of the negative. This has been my saving grace in so many ways because it grounds me back to where my heart and mind most naturally live: in a place of love rather than a place of disconnect.

And a big reminder that has resurfaced in my time of reflection: just be patient, the right answers, the right path will always be shown when the time is right…

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How about you? How does taking the time to be reflective enhance your life?

Blessings, Erin, Bella Bleue

©Bella Bleue Healing™ All Rights Reserved.
Please also visit my photography site: Photography by Bella Bleue.

See my Facebook page for daily inspirations and messages.

Discovering Strength, Healing, Inspiration, Spirituality

Attempting Certainty in Your Uncertainty

So you don’t know where life is taking you? Maybe you thought you were on one path and suddenly there is a detour, and you are forced onto a road you would never have chosen on your own. And as you are going down this path you keep looking for road marks that you recognize, and sometimes you find one, but when you get up close you realize it is not the marker you know. In other words, life is filling you up with uncertainty, and you are doing all you can to regain the certainty in your life.

Lately, I have been having uncertainty on a daily basis, and I don’t like the way it feels. I’ve been trying to just ignore it, which doesn’t work out so well. I don’t know how you are with uncertainty, but even if I’ve convinced myself that everything will be okay, my body does a 180 on me and messes with my system. And this underlying physical discomfort continues to remind me that I don’t really know what is going on, even though my mind is saying, “JUST LET IT BE.”

So I’ve been working at calming myself daily, to regain my center, to just feel like me again. And daily I seem to be discovering something that does allow my mind, body and spirit to regain some balance, even if I fall off track again.

For the first few days, I did my research. I educated myself. Sometimes this puts my mind at ease, other times it just creates more worry. But I like making sense of things so it mainly helps.

I looked for stories about other people who went through what I am going through to both normalize my situation, but to also find comfort in knowing that I’m not the only one who has the questions I do. There is something very comforting in knowing I am not alone in my journey.

I have reached out to those who I love, and who love me, and just asked them to listen. And to pray for me. I find that there is great power in communal prayer or intentions of healing towards those we hold in our hearts. So I always ask for prayers when I need them.

I have opened myself more to the Spirit, and offered prayers for myself, asking to have my mind and body calmed; for acceptance no matter what the outcome is; and for blessing upon me.

I have begun to pause throughout my day and be thankful for what I already have in my life, and to celebrate these gifts more intentionally throughout my day. Gratitude heals worry.

Every time, I remember to I try to breathe in, hope, peace, and love, and to breathe out all that burdens me. Giving intentionality to my breath helps my body relax.

I am attempting to exercise, to get the powerful positive endorphins moving though my body, so my cells can be filled with healing. This creates a better balance between my mind and body.

I’ve been using the gift of remembering to put my heart at ease. I look back at times when I was filled with uncertainty that I somehow made it through. This is a source of inner strength that I can turn to over and over: I’ve gotten through difficult uncertainty before so I can do it again.

And I have been remembering that even though when I am uncertain, and I want answers right away, that getting them right away isn’t always that easy. But that the answers will come when they are supposed to, and whatever they are, I will be okay.

And I am working at being in the present moment, instead of always looking at the future.

A message to leave you with:

Thich Nhat Hanh Quote by Bella Bleue

How about you? What do you do with uncertainty that helps you feel better?

I’m always looking for ways to help put balance back into my life. It certainly is a daily chore.

Blessings, Erin, Bella Bleue

©Bella Bleue Healing™ All Rights Reserved.
Please also visit my photography site: Photography by Bella Bleue.

See my Facebook page for daily inspirations and messages.

Inspiration, Life

Taking Time to Reflect

I took a journey over the last couple weeks to my home where I grew up. These last days, I have been soaking up the deeper meaning of who I am, my life’s journey and what I believe in [since I went on this journey].

So I have not forgotten about sharing in this journey with you. I have found myself needing more time to reflect, which has taken the pen out of my hand, and allowed me to pause. Soon I will write more.

How are you today? Where has life taken you over these last 21 days?

Blessings, Erin, Bella Bleue
©Bella Bleue Healing, Health & Inspiration for Your Life™ All Rights Reserved.
Please also visit my photography site: Photography by Bella Bleue

And a special Blessing to all those who have been effected by Hurricane Sandy.

Life, Spirituality

Please: Just Try to be Patient with ME!

It was one of those days. The kind of day when everyone needs you, kind of day. All you hear from the ends of every corner you try to hide in: “I need you, Mama!” And every time you get a moment of “alone-time” (which really is a figment of you imagination) the dog or cat come find you–and of course need to be pet or taken outside. So you literally want to scream! and of course catch the first plane to a secluded island of paradise, but you regain your senses and you grab a hold of the reins of your life: and you patiently respond: “Here I am. What do you need? How can I help you?”

I’m sure we’ve all had days and moments when it seems like no matter where we turn someone needs us or life is making us wait for something we hope will be better.  Whatever these moments are like they require our patience. Patience: that ‘wonderful’ virtue that life tells us to work at each day…well that is if we want to.

“Patience (or forbearing) is the state of endurance under difficult circumstances, which can mean persevering in the face of delay or provocation without acting on annoyance/anger in a negative way; or exhibiting forbearance when under strain, especially when faced with longer-term difficulties. Patience is the level of endurance one can take before negativity. It is also used to refer to the character trait of being steadfast.”    —Wikipedia

So as the day went on I did try and work at not being negative: I smiled, let my son climb all over me while I tried to type, played games, made dinner and all the usual housewife stuff with out getting angry at all…

Well, I guess I did show some frustration and raised my voice, a couple times. But I did wait it out until I got to boiling point—(which totally defeats the logic behind being patient). And then as quickly as I let it out, I put all those feelings of negativity and frustration aside and smiled again.

How are you with patience? Is it something easy or challenging for you?

When I used to go to work daily, I was really good at patience. I believed patience was defining of my character and I had to be flawless. No matter how rough or intense the situation was at work, I remained calm and serene.  I credited myself for this virtue. And people affirmed my ability to be patient.

But the problem was, I was so patient at work, i.e., I had a really high endurance for staying positive and calm even when I was frustrated or overwhelmed, that I didn’t release any of these feelings (frustration, etc.) during the day. So the negative feelings would show up at home when I felt annoyed about a house chore or responsibility; and these feelings would be released in the communication between my husband and I.  Which of course did not do wonders for our relationship.

Now that I have been away from my work environment for 8 months, I realize that although being patient at work was a virtue I prided myself on…I was not good at taking care of myself because I didn’t have a healthy outlet to release my exhaustion, frustration, or negativity that sometimes was welling up inside me while I was being patient. And I am reminded  that I am still not really taking care of myself because I experience these negative feelings when I’m at home from time to time, and I’m still not always good at creating an outlet to release them.

Do you have a way to take care of yourself when you feel exhausted from being patient?

Today I’ve come to realize that I can offer patience over and over, and continue to put on my smile for everyone, but if I am not taking care of myself while being patient, then I am doing no one a service. When I start feeling frustrated or I get impatient: wanting things to change right then and there, I get down on myself. For example, I often get the idea that I should be able to be all these things: a patient worker, a patient mother, a patient wife, a patient caregiver, a patient believer, a patient follower, etc.

But as I’ve been writing this I realize I’m doing the best I can, right? So if I have the patience for other people to be imperfect and I have the patience to wait for them to figure things out shouldn’t I offer the same kind of patience to myself? WHY OF COURSE I SHOULD. So there’s a bit of wisdom I’ve discovered. Now I just need to act on it.

What about you? Are you good at being patient with yourself when life isn’t going exactly the way you want it to, or when you just can’t seem to get life right? Are you able to provide yourself with compassion and patience while you are working on healing or recovery?  I’m going to work on all these things starting today.

We all deserve to love ourselves and one of the ways to do this is to offer ourselves the gift of patience. A gift of patience that says: “I’m not perfect, and there’s no way I can be. I am always healing, always learning, always growing…Learning to love myself and my life is an ongoing process every day.”

I truly believe that when we are patient with each other, and patient with ourselves: by allowing healing to take the time it needs to, by allowing ourselves to feel different emotions, and by allowing ourselves to take as much time to grow and develop as we need to, we will all be happier, healthier people. And Life in general will be a much more pleasant experience for us all.

So offer yourself the gift of patience.  And be well.

…and as I finish this post my son is running around the house and playing his drums…breathe…”Patience is a Virtue.” Breathe again. Smile. Amen. 

He finally went to sleep. Now I get to edit. And the house is quiet. I really worked at being patient with myself and my son today, and it seems to be paying off. And my husband was patient with me tonight too, and said, “Go ahead and work on your post” while I clean up after dinner. Wow! What a gift. I guess being patient does pay off sometimes!

Blessings, Erin, Bella Bleue

Related articles:
Be Patient with Yourself by Steve Pavlina
How to be Patient

©Bella Bleue Healing, Health & Inspiration for Your Life™ All rights reserved.

Healing, Health, Life

“I’m Not Tired. I’m Just Really Good at Not Falling-Asleep!”

My 2 1/2 year old son, runs around the house yelling, “I’m not tired!” as he loses total control and has a meltdown. Sure, he’s not tired…”Mamma, I’m not tired at all!”

I realize my son, speaks with great wisdom and honesty. I know oh too well, how to stay up way past my tired place, and then discover the next day I am completely wore-out. Yet, I’ll go through my day, and do it all over again. “I’m not tired!” But the truth is I’m exhausted…emotionally and physically at times… But of course, I just won’t let myself fall asleep.

Does this ever happen to you?

I find in this day and age I’m always feeling the need to be connected.  Connected to all this stuff in the World Wide Web. I need to be fed by it, and nourished by it. And because I’ve become so involved in it, my mind at times finds it so hard to just be calm…and thus to just close my eyes and fall asleep.  I need to be better about disengaging!

Other times I feel like I just need to be alone, to discover something, to just relax. And then I end up busying myself with something and staying up too late at night—Like listening to music that energizes me rather than relaxes me…

My eyes are tired.

My mind is tired.

My body is tired.

“So just go to bed, Why don’t you?!”

But, “I’m not tired!”

Stop lying to myself, I say.

I realize that as I have become intentional about caring for myself by listening to my own breath better & getting to know myself deeper I have become happier and healthier. But I need to rest more.  I need to be intentional about taking the time to let myself deeply sleep.

So I am going to work on

  1. Washing my face and being intentional about imagining that I am washing away all the stresses of the day and leaving them behind.
  2. Drying my face and freeing myself of tomorrow’s worriesmy face is refreshed and calm.
  3. Walking myself up to bed earlierallowing myself to be done with the day, and leaving it downstairs–making my bedroom a place to truly relax.
  4. Taking the time to listen to my husband’s meditation music before falling asleepcreating a sense of bodily-felt calm.
  5. Taking the time to pray and be connected to the Divine or to MeditateIt helps me let go of my worries that might be left too deep to be washed away, and placing them in hands of the Sacred who can carry all things that I cannot.

What about you? What do you do to help yourself rest and fall asleep?  Are you intentional about allowing yourself to go to bed when you need to?

May you discover a sense of peace within yourself…

Blessings, Erin, Bella Bleue
©Bella Bleue Healing, Health & Inspiration for Your Life™ All rights reserved.

Healing

The Healing Power of Sharing Your Story

In my time here in the blogging community I have had the sacred opportunity to read people’s stories-and share my own. The stories that come from deep within our hearts…the ones that make you feel..because you know that could be your story too, or someone else’s story has already been part of your own story. There is great power in how our story—the way we make sense of our experience—effects and impacts our healing journey.

I am grateful for the healing power of our storiesby sharing them we have the ability to heal.—Until I was able to admit openly my struggle with depression, healing was pretty much null and void. But when I began to share—which happened because I finally was able to witness my story in my heart—the healing began, and continues…

What is it like for you to feel and know your own story?

I am grateful for the gifts of strength and survival that we were created with, so that even in the midst of suffering, somehow we have the courage to live—it always amazed me in my days as a spiritual counselor in the hospitals, how those who decided they were not going to be defined by their illness and instead continued to be themselves, were the ones who lived life, and those who let their fear consume them, or the disease define them, slowly or quickly withered. Your journey of healing is effected by how you make sense of and share your story of suffering, illness, loss, divorce, etc.

When I was afraid of my depression, it consumed me—I didn’t want to admit it was a part of me so my depression had control, but when I accepted that “My depression is a part of me, but I will not let it define me,” I became in control, and my healing journey continues to happen because this has become the  story I now live my life by.

  • When you are ready, put your own words in place of mine or create your own powerful statement! And if you already have one–congratulations to you!

How has sharing your story lead to healing in your life?

A Healing Blessing from Me to You:

May you be surrounded by healing love, a healing love that comes from all of creation, and gently and powerfully calls your name. And in those moments when you cry out, may the depths of your heart be heard by all the angels who are there to protect you and by the love of the Divine–who is there to carry you when you don’t have the strength to carry yourself. And may all the blessings that are good & pure and full of light & harmony be with you now and always.

Blessings, Erin, Bella Bleue
©Bella Bleue Healing, Health & Inspiration for Your Life™

Healing, Inspiration

A Great Healing Happening

When we seek healing and inspiration from deep within ourselves, it often helps to be touched by light. Nature provides us with the gift of the sun. The sun illuminates the plants of the earth and gives them depth. When you let the sun shine upon you, you also can let the depths of yourself shine; revealing from deep within you, your dreams, your hopes, your goals, your aspirations, your beauty, your integrity, and so much more!

These recent days of 80+ degree weather and long days of sunlight in the Northeast have been bringing people out of their homes, and neighbors are meeting one another. The weather and the changes in nature are causing people to connect to one another, and share their joy for the weather with each other. This is causing inspiration to be communal rather than the experience of just one person.  As nature is providing itself as the source of inspiration, people are becoming aware of themselves and others as they are inspired by nature, and thus there is not only a joy from the weather, but also a feeling of a great healing happening between people, within people and all of creation.

Man is not himself only…He is all that he sees; all that flows to him from a thousand sources…He is the land, the lift of its mountain lines, the reach of its valleys.  Mary Austin

Woman is not herself only…She is all that she sees; all that flows to her from a thousand sources…She is the land, the lift of its mountain lines, the reach of its valleys. –Mary Austin (rewritten)

Light Shines as Nature Springs Forth!

Healing has great power when it is a shared goal among many. Trusting in your own inspiration, can be enhanced when others are also affirming the inspiration you feel. The presence of healing through nature in tune with healing among people…pretty powerful stuff!

Blessings, Erin, Bella Bleue
©Bella Bleue Healing, Health & Inspiration for Your Life™