One of the greatest ways to connect to another person is to give him/her the gift of your listening ear. Every single one of us wants to be heard. We want our words to mean something to someone else, because the words we speak come from within our being. Just as you long for attention from another person, someone else longs for your attention. During my years as a spiritual counselor, I’ve discovered that listening, usually without saying a word, to someone’s story is most often the greatest healing gift I can offer; and within personal relationships it is the one of the greatest gifts I can receive.
When you feel listened to you are empowered to trust more deeply in the wonderful, amazing, incredible, fabulous, unique, (& so much more) person you are! -Bella Bleue
I invite you:
- To make an extra special effort to really listen to someone you care about.
- After you walk away from this experience take some time to reflect on what you learned about this person that you hadn’t noticed before AND
- Reflect on what it was like to be so fully present for another.
- If you are the one who needs to be listened to: Ask that the other person to listen
It’s amazing how when we “Hear Someone Long Enough to Listen” we are giving an incredible gift, and at the same time receiving so much in return.
I originally shared this post in my first weeks of blogging. I sometimes return to my writings to see if there is anything I need to reflect on, or that speaks to me in a different way at this moment in life. After sharing my last post about healing our brokenness, I reflected some more…and part of ‘naming’ what I feel is also being able to share my story with someone and be listened to.
I continue to be grateful for the supportive community of readers and writers here from all over the world.
As we listen to each other and support each other, a deeper healing is happening in our lives and in our world.
Blessings, Erin, Bella Bleue
©Bella Bleue Healing, Health & Inspiration for Your Life™ All rights reserved.
If you like to read more from Rachel Naomi Remen, M.D., check out her book: “Kitchen Table Wisdom :Stories that Heal”. The quote is from her message, “Just Listen.” I have more about her in my Blogroll. Blessings!
12 thoughts on “Hear Me Long Enough to Listen”
Beautiful post Erin. I have read (and own) Dr. Remen’s book~ loved it from the start. You are so right about your message here. The greatest gift we can give someone in need is our ‘presence’ … This gets lost very often in the chaos of our modern world… Once again so grateful to you for bringing the lesson home for all of us here on your wonderful blog! ~ Much Love, RL
Oh, that’s so wonderful! I love her books. I was introduced to them in my early days in residency at the hospitals, and had to buy my own copies immediately after I heard a couple of her stories. I have both the Kitchen Table Wisdom and, My Grandfather’s Blessings. Thank you for your affirmations, and the gifts you share! Blessings, Erin
Me too…had to get GB after reading KTW! So glad you were introduced to her work in mainstream medical training…such a need for this component in our country’s medical education. Thanks for sharing Erin! ~ RL
Yeah, I wish more of the Docs would read the books…my education was in spirituality so I got blessed in being introduced to different forms of healing…like Rumi and Dr. Remen. Thanks! 🙂 Erin
That is wonderful Erin. The planet is fortunate to have people like you in the healing world!! Much Love ~
Enjoyed this post, as I have so many others! I’m one of those kinds of people who attract people who need to “talk.” Usually the stuff is pretty intense. Since I’m empathic I “feel it” with them and that can be difficult if you don’t put up appropriate psychic boundaries…I’m terrible at it. I’m the kind of person who tries to notice and acknowledge folks who normally live on the fringe. Sometimes it’s not even listening folks want…they just want someone to notice they exist.
Yes, so often people do just need to be noticed, and it is a gift you certainly seem to have—being able to notice those who long to be seen. And yes it is so important to take care of you too in the giving of yourself that you offer. I work at that as well. I hope you had a wonderful weekend, and thank you always for your deeply meaningful and honest comments. You are fabulous! Blessings, Erin
Thank you Erin for this post. I usually don’t look at the past, but I couldn’t help crying here and wondering why it took me so long to find someone who could finally listen to me. It took too long, and now although I know my online friends are listening, it’s a huge effort from me to feel comfortable enough to share. In fact, I can only answer questions, and wouldn’t be able to just tell what I am feeling. I want to get better
Hi Nikky! Thank you for all of your comments and your stories about life. You share so much about what you are feeling in what I read from you…but it sounds like the deeper parts you can’t always bring up to the surface…and that’s just fine! You are an amazing woman, and I admire you for the strength that you have to share what you do! I am so grateful for the meaningful sharing and comments that you offer. You are fabulous! How are you today? I hope you are well. Blessings, Erin
Thank you Erin for your loving heart. I’m OK. thank you. You’re right, there is a lot more hidden emotions
One of the best and often most challenging gift you can give yourself is the gift of being Gentle with You. I know I work at it every day. And when I accomplish a gentle day with myself…I’m so much better than when I don’t. How are you today? Blessings, Erin
As is so often the case, this post fits so perfectly into my life. I was just thinking this morning how in relationships I am so often the listener. I am a good listener, and I truly care about people and love to hear their stories. Sometimes I wish the storytellers would hear my stories, too. But, after reading your post, I think maybe I need come right out and ask and be more assertive at times. Thank you for your perspective, Erin. You really do so often help. I know we often don’t realize the impact we have on others so I am here to tell you– I am so grateful for you and your words. Thank you. ~ Lily